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Daughter's Text Messages with Boyfriend Is a Concern
A concerned mom on the forum asks: "My husband and I periodically check our 14 year old's phone text messages. There are messages suggestion things like staying the night together and other things that we are hoping has not happened yet. Luckily we have till Friday to figure out a game plan as to what to say and do. There are going to be some tighter restrictions on the phone and her iPod all together! Could even possibly be gone all together! Any suggestions on things to say and restrictions would be great! The boyfriend's mother was the first person I called! So she is also aware of the situation!"
Denise's thoughts: I think a good talk with your daughter is in order and possibly with the boyfriend as well. Be understanding, as they probably have strong feelings for each other and you wouldn't want you daughter to feel ashamed for normal physical feelings towards the opposite sex. But state your family's values and be very clear about your expectations on their physical relationship.
Unless she has really gone over the line with something like sending nude pictures or she is up late into the night texting, I wouldn't restrict the cell phone or iPod. Logically the problem is with the relationship with the boyfriend, not the use of her cell phone. So a more logical consequence, if you feel there is a need for one, would be a week of no dates? or something along those lines.
Asking our parenting community: What consequence would you give or would you give one at all? Have you had this experience? Please share your thoughts, advice and experiences in our comments area.
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