About Parenting Teens: Moving a High School Jr to a New Town?

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Parenting Teens Parenting Teens Teens Today High School 101 Community From Denise Witmer, your Guide to Parenting Teens Moving a High School Jr to a New Town? Quick Links: Real Parenting Questions | Parenting Style Quiz A dad on our forum is seeking advice: After hunting for a new job, an opportunity that my wife and I have been waiting for came open and I accepted the job. The job puts us 1 to 1-1/2 hours from grandparents and other family as compared to the current 4 hours and puts us in a small town my wife and I crave. The job itself is an awesome opportunity for me and I am so excited. It is where my wife and I want to retire to. Unfortunately, it means that we have to move from a place where my kids have lived most of their lives. I have 2 sons. My youngest son, 13 and an 8th grader is fired up to move closer to family. He loves Iowa, where we have to move. The issue is with my oldest son. He is 17 and a junior in High School. He wants nothing to do with moving. My wife and I initially thought about having my wife stay with my older son in our current town to let him finish high school with his friends, which include a girl friend. My younger son would come to live with me and attend school in our new home. We have heard a large and vocal advice from family, a pastor, and friends to not break up the family and move everyone down as soon as possible. I have also heard stories of how difficult it would be for my older son. I am looking for advice and experience from this group. I think my older son would move, be it kicking and screaming, I am concerned of messing up his life at this stage. Also, I don't want to be removed as part of his last 1-1/2 years of being home and splitting my sons apart. My wife and I are having a difficult with this issue. Again, any advice? Denise's thoughts: I'm going to say if there is an opportunity to allow him to finish high school with the people he has known all of his life, I would take it. You are no less of a family if you live in two different areas for a little while. I moved my daughter at the end of her freshman year and that was very hard for her and she still had 3 years to go to high school. Moving him now, in the 2nd half of his Jr year could make him feel that he has to make choices that go against your wishes. If you had no other choice, I would say sit down and talk with him. Come to an agreement on how he will get to visit his friends and how he will be able to keep up with them. Get him involved in things when you reach the new school so that he makes at least one or two good friends there too. Since you have a choice of your wife staying so he can go to school - and he knows it - I would do that for him, letting him know that the summer after high school he will need to move. You would need to make that clear. Asking our parenting community: What would you do in this situation? Have your moved your teen to a new town? Please share your thoughts, advice and experiences with us in the comments area. Suggested Reading: Moving Easing the Transition Effective Communication in Discipline Parenting Contracts - Free Printable Contracts Helping Siblings Cope With Teen Moving Out or Going to College Quick Links: Real Parenting Questions | Parenting Style Quiz How To Oversee Your Teens Blog or Social Networking Page Teens want freedom - being dynamic parents who know that freedom can lead to independent thinking and responsible doing, we want our teens to have freedom. The big 'but' is that we need to keep our teens safe at the same time. Not an easy task when your teen has access to the entire world from the family room. But it is doable. Read this article to learn how. Related Resources 3 Things Parents Need to Tell Their Blogging Teens What Parents Need To Know About Teens and Internet Usage Parenting Poll: How often do you check your teen's email? Social Networking Safety Guidelines - Yea or Nay? See More About:  internet safety for teens  teen rules and responsibilities  teen blogs Therapeutic Boarding Schools for Troubled Teens Therapeutic boarding schools focus on helping troubled teens by providing therapy and support to treat emotional, behavioral and learning problems that are interfering with their ability to succeed academically... read more. See More About:  parenting advice  teen health  parenting troubled teens High School Survival Guide for Parents As teens grow older, they are more capable and independent. But with this independence, they need guidance from their parents in order to survive and get the most out of their high school education. This high school survival guide for parents will use the resources below to help you guide your teen to achieving in their highest potential in high school. 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